Memorial Day...One year ago today

     One year ago today we saw her picture. Today she is our daughter! We didn't know that we needed her, but God did!

She found Jaydn's goggles

She loves rocking in her chair, looking at books.

She is in love with Natalie & Jaydn

She was playing peek-a-boo from behind the chair

Chalk time

She loves her ice pops!

Just had to share

     Maggie started going to preschool about 5 weeks ago. At first I tried her in my 2yo classroom, which only made me have an hour breakdown (literally - man! those tears wouldn't stop). SO, with encouragement from my teacher friends, I put her in another 2yo room. Every week the "hand-off" gets better. She still SCREAMS (as soon as we turn the corner to her room) but now she lunges for her teacher while screaming, AND the screaming only lasts for a minute. She is then off to play.
     The room she is in is attached to mine, so we have a blanket covering the window between the two so she can't see me. I have loved peeking through to watch her play. She is CRUISING around that room now! And she is happy! One mom stopped me in the hall the other day and said, "Look at her! She has LIFE in her eyes! Look at the LIFE!"
     One more thing about today...she played kick-ball at school. Kick-ball! They said she gets her stance, with one foot in front of the other, and just grins. And then she does the bases!
   
     I still have so many "oh my word, we have a 2yo again" moments! I am just amazed at what God has done in our lives this last year. On Memorial Day weekend last year, we saw a picture of her for the first time. One year later she has already been a Barcalow for 10 weeks/home for 9! C-R-A-Z-Y!

     Don't ever doubt what God can do in your life. God's spirit is so unbelievably powerful, and at times unpredictable. After 2 1/2 months of coaxing from His spirit, we said yes to adoption. Hopefully we are an example of how much God can change a mindset and a heart. Maybe we will do this again sometime.... : )

Thanks for being interested in our family!

This was our first pic of her

At week 9 of being a Barcalow. Don't know if you can see
the dirt so much, but she had just made her first MESS with the dirt.
Love it! We let her play and play. She also had her "cape" on.
Her big sis had hers on, so she needed one too (It's an apron).

8 weeks home

     We went to see Maggie's Neuro doctor today. He was happy that she is walking and talking. He said the report on her eyes (that there is no swelling or pressure on her optic nerve; and that her eyesight is fine) is HUGE. So, we thank our God for that!
     Just this past week, Maggie decided it was time to let go of our fingers and go it on her own! She is wandering all over now. It is such a joy to watch her wander and get into everything! And her babbling - so sweet! She will mimick everything now. Not all the words are clear, but she is trying.
     I mentioned that Maggie was approved for Babynet last week, which gives her in-home therapy. We should start that within the next 2 weeks. A plus to the program is that if she still needs help at 3yo, she will transition into the program at Sugar Creek Elementary, which is where Natalie and Jaydn go! AND, I was just told that there is transportation with that also!
     Natalie and Jaydn continue to do well with our family transition. Natalie has a hard time coming home after school to find that Maggie is still napping. I have to close Maggie's door all the way so that Natalie won't peek in and wake her up before it's time. HaHa
     I do think the "newness" of a cute little sister is starting to wear off though, as they have both made comments that she is bothering them. I just smile and listen.
   
     I realize that some of the pictures below, some of you have seen on FaceBook, but they are for those of you who are not on there. : )

Maggie, wearing Natalie's glasses, begging for Jaydn's yogurt

Maggie at school

I don't have a title...

     This Wednesday Maggie will have been home for 8 weeks. Crazy! She is such a sweet little gal. Natalie continues to tell us that she was a great addition to our family!
     Last week Maggie was approved for BabyNet in SC. As a result, she will be able to get varying therapies for free. B-L-E-S-S-I-N-G. We are just waiting to hear from one of the two organizations we picked, to tell us when she starts. Someone will come to our home weekly and work with her. We are thinking she will need speech, and maybe help building the confidence to walk on her own.
     She is mimicking everything now. Words, dancing, singing... She LOVES music!
     This week my goal is to write out our journey for Show Hope, which gave us a huge grant to bring Maggie home. I finally feel like I have the time to sit down and write it out. Hopefully it doesn't end up as a book. HaHa

Wearing Natalie's glasses. She loves glasses of any kind.

Learning to come down the stairs.

Just a sweet day

     I went away on a Women's Retreat with my church this past weekend. It was wonderful! It was also nice to come home though; I do love our home.
     Maggie remained with me the rest of the day after I returned home. Often holding my finger, or just playing close. So sweet.
     She is deciding to walk by herself more and more each day. Today she even played on her tricycle, which was a first! Normally, if outside, she just wants to walk with me or Matt.
     She is repeating things all the time now. If Matt or I call for one of the "big kids" she is our echo. She ends our prayers with "A-Men!", and can say a verse, "God made ME!".
     She is a true blessing, as our Natalie and Jaydn. We are beyond blessed.

Ride/Walking her bike. She knew she was big stuff.

She was talking the whole time.

Little bit of walking with mom.

Getting better all the time

     Just a quick update on Maggie. She went to the nursery this past Sunday and did fine! And these first two days of school this week have been MUCH better!
     Around the house she is becoming more comfortable by the day; doing LOTS of wandering! Love it!!!
     Thank you for all the kind words and prayers, making sure I, mentally, made it through last week! God moved in my heart and mind for sure!

First corn on the cob

She loves some yogurt ("yo-urg" as Maggie says)

On our way to school.

Whew! We are tired!

Within 5 minutes of leaving school/work, this is my sweet view.

     As far as journeys go, today has been an upward climb. This day started with tears for me, just not looking forward to going to work with Maggie. Sounds awful, but just speaking reality. 

     I told the Lord on the way to work what I envisioned is different than what our experience has been. 

     Maggie lived within 3 rooms the first two years of her life. She wasn't taken outside because they didn't have enough help to take 7-10 one-year-olds out. So, in my bubble world, I thought that when she saw everything that we have for her, everything offered to her at Playschool (where I work), she would want to jump right in. And that is not what is happening. She is choosing to be loved on, rather than to play; being held over toys. Imagine that. Our most basic need. To be loved. 

     For Maggie, she was cared for, but not much with physical touch. So, we are filling that cup up for her. But to be honest, it takes a toll on me. I LOVE our Maggie Mei. Love, love, love her. But as far as attachment goes, it is me she adores and wants the most attention from. 

     I keep asking the Lord, 'why is it that some days I feel too tired to be needed so much?' Simple answer? Because I am not God. 

   Scripture says in Isaiah 40 that God never grows tired or weary. NEVER. I can't hardly keep my eyes open past 9p. And my awesome husband has picked up all my slack today b/c I have been so weepy. It's hard to fathom never being tired or weary. 

     One of my favorite songs right now is by Bethel Church, called One Thing Remains. (look it up on youtube if you haven't heard it) "His love never fails, never gives up, never runs out on me." I could sing that all day long. I think the 'never runs out on me' is what my mind smiles at so often. Or maybe 'never gives up'. It's a toss-up. Either way, I say to my God, Thank you Jesus. Thank you for being so incredibly big and awake. I so need You!

Her hair is finally thick enough for a pony-tail!